Tom Brady’s return made Stephen Belichick look constipated

The many hideous faces of Stephen Belichick.

The many hideous faces of Stephen Belichick.
Screenshot: NBC

This game lived up to the hype last night.

It was the most anticipated regular-season game in recent history. And it took a doinked 56-yard field goal to decide it.

Emotions were running high before the game and people around that stadium had their eyes watering like they just got hit with pepper spray after eating a red hot chili pepper.

However, once the game started it was all business and the Patriots came out on a mission. The defense held the Buccaneers offense to 19 points and forced Brady into 21 incompletions with zero touchdown passes. Now, the Buccaneers were able to run through the New England defense like three-day-old Chinese food. Leonard Fournette rushed for 91 yards on 4.5 yards a carry. The Buccaneers finished the game with nearly 120 yards on the ground.

The chess match between Brady and the Patriots’ defense got so intense that outside linebackers coach Steve Belichick, Bill Belichick’s son, started acting like he was a French bulldog trying to protect his territory.

Even though the Patriots lost, their fans can take pride in the fact that Mac Jones is their guy. Back Fat Mac left his office desk at State Farm and went toe to toe with the greatest quarterback to ever do it. In many aspects he outplayed Brady. He threw for more yards, completed more passes, and threw for more touchdowns.

The dink-and-dunk passing attack of the Patriots worked against this aggressive Tampa Bay defense, especially when the Patriots allowed Jones to go no-huddle down the field.

At the end of the day, the better team won that game in the rain in Foxborough but everyone involved should be feeling really good about the outcome. Well, maybe not Little Steven.

Last night, the Patriots were able to celebrate their past while embracing their future.

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